"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline" 2 Timothy 1:7
So, I ask, what is your greatest fear? What rattles you to the core and causes you to freeze in the face of it? Mine is rejection. Rejection can come in many forms, job prospects, friendships, romantic interests, and so on but mine is rejection in intrapersonal relationships. This might surprise those of you that know me but I'm so afraid of being rejected, or disliked in any fashion that I'm afraid to step out of my comfort zone and really make a connection with someone new. Now, you all are probably saying "Yeah, right.." but seriously, I CAN talk to a brick wall, and I'll make polite small talk to a stranger in the grocery line or in a waiting room any day of the week but I'm afraid to put myself out there when I start a new friendship with anyone because I don't want to be rejected. Once I make a new connection with someone, I don't ever want to give up on that because I truly love people and want to keep the people God puts in my life around!! And yes, once you get to know me, I am an open book; it's hard for me to imagine being any other way. But the initial reaching out and offering myself to someone to build a relationship with them, PETRIFYING!!!
One of the hardest times in my life was going through my divorce, I had to deal with being rejected and left behind. Some of that fear was from the unknown, some from the unavoidable changes that were coming, but mostly it was my greatest fear coming to fruition, I had been completely rejected. God really used that time to show me that my fear of rejection by people here on earth, wasn't what I should be focusing on, He wanted my focus to be on HIM because he will never forsake or reject us when we are truly His children! God constantly brought me back to Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." The amazing thing about God's timing is that I was in a Bible study group with some really amazing women and God used my experience to immediately minister to other women, and isn't that what it is all about? I drew my strength from Him, without God as my strength, I would have never made it so seamlessly through that huge change in my life. My focus stayed on Him and doing the right thing for my kids. I know people that seem to still not have conquered the sense of failure that can stem from a marriage being destroyed, and the only thing I can offer is God brought me THROUGH it...not out of it, not around it, but through it. I was extremely fearful of the unknown but knowing God was on my side made it so much easier.
All relationships are hard, but they are also what makes our life here on earth worth living. God made us emotional human beings to interact and develop deep interpersonal relationships with one another. He allows us to experience things in our lives, both extremely good and deeply horrible things so that we might be able to share in those experiences through meaningful relationships with one another. Believing Romans 8:28, that God uses all things for His good, encourages me by knowing that even though I may be going through something really tough, God will use that to help someone else through a similar circumstance; or He may just be really trying to teach me something that I need in my life to get through a future situation! But either way, I trust Him completely with everything that I go through, and will be made more like Him through each thing!!
So, my question to you, what can you do with what you fear the most, to make you stronger and help others with your knowledge? I can tell you that I originally wrote this post about a year and a half ago, and it's so amazing to me to see how God has changed me... I no longer fear rejection, but understand that it is a natural (not fun, but sometimes necessary..) part of life and the blessings I have received from cultivating some really meaningful relationships SO outweigh what I would have felt if they had rejected me. I don't want to miss any of the blessings God has for me, so I am investing in relationships more than I ever thought possible today... I want God to continue to help me invest in people, my kids, my friends, my family, my future spouse whenever He brings him into my life, and any other person that God can use me to help through a tough time.
So, I ask, what is your greatest fear? What rattles you to the core and causes you to freeze in the face of it? Mine is rejection. Rejection can come in many forms, job prospects, friendships, romantic interests, and so on but mine is rejection in intrapersonal relationships. This might surprise those of you that know me but I'm so afraid of being rejected, or disliked in any fashion that I'm afraid to step out of my comfort zone and really make a connection with someone new. Now, you all are probably saying "Yeah, right.." but seriously, I CAN talk to a brick wall, and I'll make polite small talk to a stranger in the grocery line or in a waiting room any day of the week but I'm afraid to put myself out there when I start a new friendship with anyone because I don't want to be rejected. Once I make a new connection with someone, I don't ever want to give up on that because I truly love people and want to keep the people God puts in my life around!! And yes, once you get to know me, I am an open book; it's hard for me to imagine being any other way. But the initial reaching out and offering myself to someone to build a relationship with them, PETRIFYING!!!
One of the hardest times in my life was going through my divorce, I had to deal with being rejected and left behind. Some of that fear was from the unknown, some from the unavoidable changes that were coming, but mostly it was my greatest fear coming to fruition, I had been completely rejected. God really used that time to show me that my fear of rejection by people here on earth, wasn't what I should be focusing on, He wanted my focus to be on HIM because he will never forsake or reject us when we are truly His children! God constantly brought me back to Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." The amazing thing about God's timing is that I was in a Bible study group with some really amazing women and God used my experience to immediately minister to other women, and isn't that what it is all about? I drew my strength from Him, without God as my strength, I would have never made it so seamlessly through that huge change in my life. My focus stayed on Him and doing the right thing for my kids. I know people that seem to still not have conquered the sense of failure that can stem from a marriage being destroyed, and the only thing I can offer is God brought me THROUGH it...not out of it, not around it, but through it. I was extremely fearful of the unknown but knowing God was on my side made it so much easier.
All relationships are hard, but they are also what makes our life here on earth worth living. God made us emotional human beings to interact and develop deep interpersonal relationships with one another. He allows us to experience things in our lives, both extremely good and deeply horrible things so that we might be able to share in those experiences through meaningful relationships with one another. Believing Romans 8:28, that God uses all things for His good, encourages me by knowing that even though I may be going through something really tough, God will use that to help someone else through a similar circumstance; or He may just be really trying to teach me something that I need in my life to get through a future situation! But either way, I trust Him completely with everything that I go through, and will be made more like Him through each thing!!
So, my question to you, what can you do with what you fear the most, to make you stronger and help others with your knowledge? I can tell you that I originally wrote this post about a year and a half ago, and it's so amazing to me to see how God has changed me... I no longer fear rejection, but understand that it is a natural (not fun, but sometimes necessary..) part of life and the blessings I have received from cultivating some really meaningful relationships SO outweigh what I would have felt if they had rejected me. I don't want to miss any of the blessings God has for me, so I am investing in relationships more than I ever thought possible today... I want God to continue to help me invest in people, my kids, my friends, my family, my future spouse whenever He brings him into my life, and any other person that God can use me to help through a tough time.
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